A New Kind of Day

Today started just before 5am. Up too early to think, I hastily made my way, coffee-less and disoriented, to Long's Bakery in support of my wonderful co-workers, whom I am convinced appreciate me for more than just this weekly sugar fix. Walked up to the counter, gave my name, paid the bill, and was WELL on my way before I realized I hadn't thought twice about whether or not I would be able to communicate at the counter.

At the office, put in a solid morning of work (gotta love 1/2day Fridays), all the while enjoying some motivating tunes on Pandora thanks to my audio cable:

Speaking of Pandora, could we get a "two thumbs up" button? Some songs are just better than "one thumb". And I could justify my Siskel & Ebert station.

After work, met my younger bro at Sun King for the release of their newest brew made with blue spruce pine needles...actually, quite tasty. Had a quick conversation with one of the co-founder's mother, a hearing aid user who has taken a liking to observing the transition I've made to CI's.

Made a stop at Kohl's for a quick purchase. Again, was out the door before I realized I just had an actual conversation with the store clerk.

Stopped off for a hair cut with my stylist, Mandy. Honestly, I wouldn't trust anyone else to cut around my "under-skin" connectors. She's smart enough to pull off the magnetic transmitters and properly re-connect them after trimming. Always a great cut...even better not even thinking about my massive headgear.

Quick turnaround at home, then off to Greencastle with my mom for an Open House/Dinner put on by Cochlear, the manufacturer of my amazing hearing devices. Had quite a few conversations with other CI users, mostly much older than me. It was really nice to meet other people in similar situations to me, but even better to have them tell me that our conversation gives them hope and inspiration for a better hearing experience. The kicker for me was meeting a wonderful woman who's son was implanted at age 1 1/2. Now he's 3 and she's invited me to come play guitar at his school so that he and his classmates can see the benefits of CIs in an adult. Wow...talk about finding purpose.

Driving home on the interstate could get rather noisy, so I had my mom clip-on my lapel mic adapter and I could hear her perfectly while watching the road. Nothing like being safe and effectively conversing. I also enjoy using this at home with the center speaker while watching TV (which is the channel all dialog goes through, in case you didn't know).

The day's winding down and I'm just starting to realize what an array of incredible experiences I've filled it with when 6 months ago I would have:
-Missed the alarm
-Dreaded the donut purchase
-Prayed for no meetings at work
-Gone home immediately and avoided any unnecessary interaction

 Encountering all these new sounds and experiences is one thing...realizing how blessed I am is icing on the cake.

The Sound of Inspiration

Spending last week in Honduras was an experience I won't soon forget. At one point I even had a conversation with a deaf Honduran woman, through a signing translator, about my Cochlear Implants and her fears of having an operation; something I never imagined happening on this trip.

But the highlight for me came on the last day, when a sweet little girl warmed up to me quicker than any child ever has. We blew bubbles, ran and played all morning 'till I was ready to escape the caliente sol for a siesta. Thanks to my CIs, this interaction worked its way deep into my heart. Being a lifelong musician, it found its way out through poetry. I'm still struggling to process all the things I experienced last week, but they're slowly becoming clear to me. I'm cutting this post short and letting creativity take over:

She looks at me with eyes so bright

They say nothing of where she'll sleep tonight

Too soon I'll leave

As the sun goes down

And darkness abounds

Her sun-kissed face smiles and glows

Seeds of joy and laughter flow

But no one knows

As we leave this place

The tears that fill her face

She takes my hand and off we run

I wonder where her love comes from

For I look around

And all I see

Say nothing of her beauty

Now oceans apart that couldn't seem farther

Three days ago I felt like her father

I can't answer these questions

With paper and pen

Will I see her again?

The memories now in photos I've taken

Inspiring, compelling, heart breaking

Deep in need

But still she gives

Could this little girl teach me to live?

Stirring inside by the stars in her eyes

Longing to be again at her side

Finding peace in knowing

The One Who Is

Will hold her tight for she is His

A World Apart

Last Friday I traveled to Honduras for a week submerged in a culture far from what I'm used to. Having made this same trip last year with only one working ear via hearing aid, it has taken no time at all to see the difference a life with Cochlear Implants can make. I've got 5 days left in this wonderful country and I'm enjoying every minute of it.

Last year I remember feeling a constant disconnect with the world around me. The Spanish to English language barrier can be one thing, but combine it with profound hearing loss and I quickly found myself trapped inside a box of isolated frustration. I was still able to enjoy myself and connect to the people and kids around me to an extent, but there was always something that just felt clogged and incomplete.

This year I'm engulfed in a world of sound I didn't even know existed. The biggest difference is the potential or the ability to hear. Sometimes it's work. Sometimes I have to make sure I've got my processors in the right programs and settings. But it's finally possible to hear all the things I've been missing.

Things like seagulls at sunset...

Things like Spanish, I still can't understand...

 

Things like laughter and games...

Things like a handicapped sweetheart learning to speak and interact...

I heard some sounds last year. Inaudible, undefinable, disconnecting sounds. This year I hear LIFE.  All around me. Today I met up with the child I sponsor, 6 year old Angel Bulnes. Last year he was shy and uncertain about me. This year he spotted me in a crowd and ran to me, arms open. I spent some time at his house with his mom and family members. Through a drum we were able to connect creatively. Through a soccer ball we were able to connect athletically. Through a translator, we were able to connect emotionally in a way I couldn't experience before I was implanted with CIs.

Through all of these differences in experiences I've managed to find one similarity: There is love, peace and joy in La Ceiba, Honduras. And where those elements are present, two cultures a world apart can still find a common connection to goes beyond our vast differences. On top of that, I'm eternally grateful for the gift of cochlear implants, which are making each one of these experiences SO much more real to me. 

Halfway through the week, already blown away audibly, excited for what's to come thoroughly. Encontrar el amor y la audición en Honduras!

 

Hearing In Honduras

At 4am tomorrow morning I'll be meeting 21 of my current (and soon to be) best friends from City Community Church for a 9 day trip to La Ceiba, Honduras. I haven't even started packing my stuff yet. As the rediculously early hour approaches, I can't help but remember my experiences in this amazing city last year.

Amazing in the way they opened their dirt floor homes and invited US, rich-white-gringos, to share a meal with them.

Amazing in the smiles on their sun scorched faces.

Amazing in the way the sky played Picasso.

Amazing in the way a life I would call poverty completely changed my perspective on what it means to find happiness.

This ain't no mission trip. I'm not going to "save" them from their "horrible" living conditions. I can't spend a week with them and expect their hardships to vanish completely. I AM going because of the love they've shown ME. A love and a hospitality and a friendship that compelled two guys' hearts to the point where THIS came pouring out.

Last year I still wore a Left hearing aid (deaf in Right). I remember a few times when there would be games and conversations at night that I struggled so hard to understand and meaningfully engage in, that I retreated to my room to escape the uncontrollable frustration. Granted that gave me time to write an inspired song.

This year I'm going with bi-lateral cochlear implants, and the fears and frustrations have already been replaced with joyous anticipation. The song-writing is still a work in progress due to pitch perception, but it's going to be an incredibly new experience for me guaranteed.

Look for me to post an update on my adventures next week. Adios América, Hola Honduras!

Now about that packing....Holla what?

Day At The Park

Staring down the face of a free Saturday, I rolled out of bed at 6am for a morning hiking session. 8 years of youth hockey will train you quickly to give up on Saturday-Sleep-Ins. And if you know me well at all, you know I also have an openly professed love for sunrises. It's a little tougher in the summer with the 6am'ers, but in my opinion, well worth it. Quick shower, coffee in hand, destination: Brown County State Park.

With no recent experience here I picked Trail 9, a rugged loop with a connector from Ogle Lake (pictured). Knowing I'd be in the woods, I skipped the sunscreen and opted for a couple layers of Deep Woods OFF. And off I went.

Now hiking by myself usually doesn't bother me, but something just kept itching under my skin today (thankfully not mosquitoes). Let's just say the subconscious "voices" were having a good time at my expense:

You know you're the only person out on this secluded trail at 8am, right?

  

You know all it takes is a loose rock and you're tumbling down this ravine and no one will ever find you, right?

 

 

You know there's likely grizzly bears and mountain lions (the kind that live in Indiana) lurking around the corner, right?
 


So I find myself a rather large "walking stick". I figure I'll get one good shot in then scream 'till someone comes and breaks it up. Slowly but surely the jitters fade. Might have been lack of oxygen from climbing hill after hill that eventually took my mind off the impending velociraptor attack. But seriously, it's not hard at all for my mind to get lost in God's beautiful creation...what is there to be afraid of? Well, cobras, yeah...but really, what?

Covered in cobwebs at about the 45 minute mark, I was expecting to have hit the loop. So...the thing about it is, the map says "Distance 3.0/2.75 Miles" which I interpreted as, the loop is 2.75 and it's 3 total with the connector. Blame it on lack of sleep, lack of coffee, whatever you want, but as an Engineer I'd like to think I could understand a map a little better. Ends up it's a 3 Mile Loop with a 2.75 Mile Connector...the cool thing about connectors being that you get to take them TWICE to get back to where you parked. Do the math, yeah that's nearly 9 miles of rugged terrain before lunch time (and BOY was it lunch time after that).

Finally on the loop at about the "1/2way" point I find myself coming to the top of a ridge thinking there's destined to be some rewarding view for hiking all the way BACK here. Yup, there was a rewarding view all right. For hiking all the way up top of the ridge, nestled back in the deep enchanted forest you get rewarded with a beautifully, snotty, frog pond:

"I'm not sure that's Pete, Delmar..."

All jokes aside, it was a very pleasant stroll through the woods. My favorite part was the abundance of birds singing a soundtrack for my journey. I also enjoyed some music with my audio cable connectors. Nothing like a 1:1 mix of Dream Theater and Woody The Woodpecker to gain that needed burst of energy.  AND I finally ran across other people crazy enough to hike back to a 3 MILE loop trail from a 2.75 MILE connector. Which means there's a good chance someone WILL INDEED find me after the panthers are finished.

 Can't leave this park without a breathtaking view